Too tired to blog…

Lambent dragonfly…

image imageHi all!  This month has been more insane than usual.  I don’t really think that i can put it in chronological… But i will try to put Everything in boxes and get them out there.  Please bare with the boxes etc. Brain lapses etc.

Friends visiting

Raquel and Malia visited and accompanied me to  couple of doctor appointments.  Was great because we were all tired, but not so much that I could not move yet.

Kerstin came from China, hong kong and Germany to see us, which is mightily flateringly, thing! We also played with Mehndi…  And she did this amazing crown!  It has just gorgeous lines and details all of which mean something to me: Dragon, dragon fly (lambent draonfly). A sun, tree of Gondor, and yin/yang.

Next up, our friends Niko and Emily came for a 1 day chill fest!  Emily and I mostly just chatted and did arts and crafts with no expectations and lots of Chill.. Since that is pretty much it all worked well!

Next up we have Mark Axelrod whom we haven’t seem in an age!  Reallynlooking forwards to seeing!   There were other visitors Tim Kholar my folks etc, but i am trying to keep it all reasonably organized… Knock wood.

MEdical Stuff

When Raquel and Malia went with me to a tooth exam for my teeth to make sure I am Ok and, this is where the monkey hits the toilet… ugh.  This part will be really out of order, but i am going to try to be as accurate as i can.

Basically my meds got completely out of balance.  I started getting serious seizure symptoms.  But no one was really on it.  My legs started so weak I couldn’t use them for normal things.  Standing up from the flow was/ is pretty imposible.  I fell at least 3 times spectacularly, and several times less scarily.   There were two in particular that scared me to heck.  Once was in the Dressing room at mark and spenser.  I got dizzy, fell nose first into their mirror.  And.. Couldnt stand up… My legs were too weak…  And, the dressing room opened IN.  In short, my legs would not work nd they couldnt get me out because there was no space… Eventually, they called a TAxi.  Only turns out they only hired it for us.. We had to pay!  Eyeroll…..

Second scariest i think was falling down the stairs here at home…. I had david walking me up the stairs, standing behind and helping.. Pretty sure anywhere else we Probably would hear how reeally it was silly where got it.  Grin.

But this situation was”… Less functional.  I somehow managed to trip on the stairs and fall and Push Off the stairs, landing hard on my back. Owie…

But it was the next time i wound up in the a&e.  I fell in our bathroom and, course couldn’t stand up.  They sent us three awesomely strong female parmedics who have impressed me in all ways possible.  Cheerful, strong, smart, kind, knowledgable.  They had me moved in no time….  Unfortunately the actual hospital trip was more snafu.  11 hours of people not talking to eachother  there.  Even when we knew what was meant to happen, somehow it never did.

and then the piece de Résistance?  The transport team meant to move me turned out to be con artists.  They told us they knew exactly where our bus was needed because one of their sons attended the scool literally 100 yards from our house.  But as we approached they suddenly roared around our street and as we called out our stop they just kept saying yeah we know! And speeding around the neighborhood.  One of the nurses explained that the transport now is paid indipendandtly and so in fact it pays for them to dawdle.   Yeesh.

Other stuf

Yes, and there are other things, too.  Some are medical, some less so.  For instance.  More and more pieces of equipment and more and more  fabulous medical kinds  of women with notebooks keep showing up..  I now have 5 inch mattress to let me stand up easier.  I have a raised toilet and bars to make standing easier.  They want to put bars coming up the outside pathway.  And we are tring to get me transported to the Hospital…  Tht is anoher issue.  The chemo folks want me There..  And they dont understnd while the tansport folks csnt jus Do It…. And of course the transport has their own protocalls.  Sooooo, wheeee!    Sounds like communication can only be useful!

honestly, I am grateful formallmthe help.  But, you all know how shy I am.  2-4 people in my house daily becomed sort of stress full…  Not as s restful as havingr the ability to move on my own.  But no idea when that comes.

possibly moving.

This is not in stone, but i have been thinking about how people will care for me with stairs…  It seems to me that having a 3 bedroom 1 floor flat will be both safer and cheaper, once we manage to get past the innitial moving costs..   Also, our landlord and this house.. Well,they suck…   Just gotta think it through…  And my Thinking Days are rather at a low at the moment… Still,, thoughts must be better.  Hope all of your days are like my good ones!


  1. Thank you for bringing us up to date. It has not been a very great time, but you have had some fine visitors and a nice crown. We send you safety and restfulness. Love you. Mom

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